Feels so distant yet so near.

It feels so distant yet so near.
It feels so unreal yet so here.

It happened two years ago.

I'll never forget the tweet I read. Two years ago. Today.
I'll never forget the twitter handle of the tweet.

From grade 2 speeches to undergrad documentary.
He gave me the Yearning.
He taught me how to speak to God.

From my childhood to now, it just took a bullet to take it all away.

I used to forget the way I used to walk away from killings.
I used to forget the way I switched channels from attacks.

But from the day he died, I never forget.
I'll never forget how you all stood watching.
I'll never forget the way we still stand watching.

For we are more dead than this man who seems so alive in the hearts and minds of many around.

Who continues to let the dying pain ache within.
Who continues to tell me to not to forget for anyone, lest I forget.

you call it emotions lacking rationality.
you drag the case in the courts of politics.
you drag my faith and justify the killing.
you drag God to rationalise silence.
you update statuses for Peshawar. And then you forget.

You hashtag 'neverforget' as you slowly forget.

you bury the pain and you forget.

It feels so distant yet so near.
It feels so unreal yet so here.

I'll never forget.
And I pray you don't lose a legend so human or a child so angelic to make you not to forget.

To the man I can't ever do justice to in words.
To the man I can't ever thank enough.
To the Human I can't stop thinking of ways he helped.
To the chacha, to childhood bikerides, to school speeches and conversations.
To the legend the world yet so fondly remembers today.

the ideology that killed him taught me about the tradings of God.
the ideology that rationalises the silence and lazy excuses teaches me the falling price of God.
the one who calls me an idol worshiper and kills me teaches me about the powerful idol he is worshipping.

the one who kills to the one who stays silent to the one who forgets - teach me about the idol gods of fear, power, luxury, laziness and brainwashed versions of god - bought and sold around me in drawingrooms and circles today.

It feels so distant yet so near.
It feels so unreal yet so here.

It happened two years ago.

I'll never forget.
And I pray you don't lose a legend so human or a child so angelic to make you not to forget.